Dick The Pimp *Swagg Pimpin' 24 7* {The Freaky King of Porn and SeXXX}



Last Updated:

Post New Blog
Manage Blog
Email to a Friend

Gender:
Status: Swinger
Age: 65
Sign: Gemini

Country: United States
Signup Date: September 26, 2019

Who Gives Kudos:


My Subscriptions

11/26/2019 

My Freaky Life Ch. 1
Category: Roleplay Stories

This is a super awesome sleazy fuckfest freaky ass sex parody... It ain't real though... Damn

This is my new series about me, living My Freaky Life... It's full of sleaze, freaky fucking and fun... It's a huge series combining real life celebrities with TV show and movie characters... There are a lot of people in it, but they will be added gradually... This series is for me and my fans that have supported me and that enjoy my stories... So to all the haters SUCK MY BIG ASS PISSING DICK (Smiling) ... This is full on Dick The Motherfucking Pimp... Enjoy my fellow freaks

My Family : My Mom Patty (Patricia Heaton)

My Dad Dr Evil (Himself)

My Grandma Helen (Helen Mirren)

My Sister Kat (Kat Dennings)

My Sister Jessica (Jessica Simpson)

My Sister Nikki Dee (Meteorologist Nikki Dee Ray)

My Cousin Penny (Penny From The Big Bang Theory)

My Cousin Rachel (Rachel Maddow)

My Cousin Anne (Chef Anne Burrell)

My Cousin Jenni (Jwoww From Jersey Shore)

My Cousin Braun (WWE Superstar Braun Strowman)

My Cousin Bubba (Former WWE Superstar James Ellsworth)

My Aunt Kathie Lee (Kathie Lee Gifford)

My Aunt Dolly (Dolly Parton)

My Aunt Peggy (Peggy Bundy)

My Aunt Jane (Jane Marie Lynch)

My Half Brother Scott (Seth Green)

"Hey everyone, this is Kim Kardashian. I'm here to introduce my husband's series about our life. James is unique, sweet, adorable, freaky, sleazy... and so fucking hot. I love my man and I love our freaky life together. This series is freaky, sleazy, wild... and a full on crazy fuckfest run amok. I hope you enjoy our stories...."

Sometimes in life, if you're lucky enough, you have moments where you just sit back and smile, enjoy every second and smile some more. I was having one of those moments, watching my three sisters... Kat, Jessica and Nikki Dee... make out, while I sat on the bed, smoking a blunt. I've had these moments before. I've fucked all three a bunch of times, but this time just seemed more special. I inhaled deep and exhaled slowly into the air, my cock rock hard, my blue eyes glued to my three fucking gorgeous, big titted sisters. They all looked at me, smiling so sexy, groping each other's tits, grinding against each other. Nikki Dee blew me a big kiss. I smiled. Kat sucked on Jessica's awesome, milk filled jugs. I motioned for Nikki Dee to come over and she did.

She crawled on the bed and licked my hard cock slowly. Nikki Dee smiled while she slowly licked every inch of my throbbing manmeat. She kissed all over my cock and balls too. I puffed and passed her the blunt. She took a big toke on it and passed it back. She slowly blew the smoke all over my cock and balls. Oh yeahhhh. Kat and Jessica were kissing passionately... Kat was watching me and winked. I smiled, my sisters are so fucking sexy. Nikki Dee slowly sucked my cock in, those luscious lips, stretched wide, suctioning hard, as her head bobbed on my cock. I just sighed and smoked. I love my life. Nikki Dee played with my big, meaty balls and sucked my thick shaft faster, hungrily sucking for my cum.

Kat got a strapon and put it on, bending Jessica over onto the foot of the bed. Kat rubbed the rubber cock on Jessica's beautiful labia, illiciting a sexy moan from my blonde haired sister. She winked at me. I reached down and passed Jessica the blunt. She sucked on it like it was a cock, teasing me. She exhaled and blew me a kiss. She gave the blunt to Kat, who kept it in her mouth, smoking, as she slid the fake cock up Jessica's wet, thin runway topped, pussy.

Nikki Dee sucked my cock, super fast, jerking the shaft even faster. She smiled around my thick meat, knowing she was pleasing her brother. I slowly stroked her long blonde hair and grunted. She sucked me voraciously, desperate for my jizz. I gave it to her, blasting her perfect mouth with my creamy load. "Mmmmmmmm." Nikki Dee moaned around my cumming cock, swallowing every creamy drop of jizz my cock pumped into her hungry mouth. She jerked my cock quickly, making sure to get it all. She swallowed every creamy drop down and kissed my cock, letting it fall from her mouth, rubbing her perfect face all over it, smiling so beautifully.

Kat grabbed Jessica's long, full, blonde hair, pulled it and drilled her sweet, milf pussy with that strapon. Jessica's perfect, DD tits swayed perfectly under her. I slid down the bed and she leaned down, sucking my cock deep. Nikki Dee climbed on my face, grinding on my mouth and tongue that I slid up her delicious, neatly trimmed pussy. I licked her out, tasting every single inch of her pussy walls, pinching and pulling her hard, pink clit, rubbing it quickly. "YESSSSSSSSSSS..... MMMMMMMM!!!" Nikki Dee played with my brown hair as I rolled and shook my tongue rapidly in her pink folds. She squirted on my tongue, her perfect pussy releasing her sweet juices all over my tongue and into my mouth. I lapped it all up, swallowing every drop. Jessica sucked me all the way, deepthroating my big cock easily. She gives awesome blowjobs.

Kat slammed up Jessica's snatch, her hips pounding into Jessica's thighs. Jessica moaned around my cock, licking and sucking me fast and deep. I pulled out of her mouth and Nikki Dee wrapped Jessica's big, natural tits around my throbbing cock, fucking my cock with them. I fingered Nikki Dee's ass and pussy, my thumb up her ass and my middle finger in her pussy. I finger banged her holes super fucking fast. "YESSSSSSSSSSS.... YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME CUM AGAIN JAMES!!!" I smiled and finger fucked her, tightly gripping holes, even faster. She worked Jessica's big, soft tits up and down my cock, completely covering it. Nikki Dee pulled Jessica's tits off of my cock and squeezed Jessica's big, hard nipples, shooting her milk all over my cock. Nikki Dee leaned down and licked it off of my cock. I almost popped right then. What a sexy fucking sight.

I fingered Nikki Dee's holes faster, wanting my perfect goddess sister to cum again. She did. She screamed out, "YESSSSSSSSSSS... I'M CUMMMINGGGGGGGGG!!!!" She squirted again, all over my finger and the bed. I kept fingering her holes fast, all the way through her Big O. She sucked the milk directly out of Jessica's big tits, looking back at me and smiling. Kat pulled out of Jessica and quickly removed the strapon. She put out the blunt and ran over, jumping on the bed and me. She put my cock in her pussy and rode me with intense lust and sexual fury. Her pussy ate up my big cock, devouring it as she rode me.

"FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK YEAHHHHHHH.... FUCK ME BIG BROOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" Kat loves my cock and it loves her. She slammed down on it each time, milking it, roughly taking it. I fucking loved it. I reached up and squeezed those big natural titties of hers, rubbing her thick, hard nipples with my thumbs. She kept blowing me kisses and smiling so sexy. Nikki Dee kissed Jessica. They played with each other's milk filled tits. They squirted each other's milk everywhere. They came up to me and double squirted my mouth. I drank it all down. They kissed and so did Kat... a three way kiss for my entertainment.

Kat slammed down on my cock harder. "FUCKKKKKKKKKKK... I'M CUMMMINGGGGGGGG!!!!" Kat sat up, my cock falling out of her pussy. She squirted all over it. Her pussy spasmed and shot out her pussy nut, all over my twitching cock. It was such a sexy fucking thing to see. When she finished, she quickly put my cock back in her soaking wet, throbbing snatch and rode me relentlessly. Her big tits jumping and flopping wildly. I sucked Jessica and Nikki Dee's big tits hungrily. I swallowed their milk, watching my gorgeous sister Kat ride me. She moaned loud as I fucked up into her as fucking hard and fast as I could.

"FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!" She leaned her head back and squirted again..... All over my cock, in her spasming cunt. I let loose and cum blasted her hungry cunt, as she came. A mutual orgasm for me and my sister. I sucked my other two sister's awesome, big tits as I came up Kat's very talented snatch. FUCK, IT FELT GOOD!!! When we both finished cumming, I took a deep breath and smiled. I love my three sisters. They are all three gorgeous, all three have big natural tits and all three can fuck!

We all kissed and snuggled. Kat was on my chest, Nikki Dee on my right and Jessica on my left. Oh my God, they felt good. "We all need to get married. Then we can do this all the time." Kat is sweet.

"That's cool babe... but I already have four wives... (more on that later)... and Nikki Dee and Jessica are already married."

"Yeah, but I want us to be together all the time."

"You're sweet babe... you already live with me."

"I know and I love it. I love you."

"I love you too babe."

I love Kat... she and I have always been very close. I Iove having her live with me... not just for the sex. I love being around her. We hang out and watch TV and smoke. She's a cool chick to relax with.

I went in the kitchen and saw my queen. My first wife, Kim Kardashian, was eating breakfast dressed in a short, designer, silk bathrobe. I went over and kissed her.

"Good morning my king."

"Good morning my queen."

"How are your sisters?... Sounds like they're doing really well." Kim smiled and winked at me.

"They're great babe." I said, smiling back.

I reached over and rubbed Kim's hand, kissing her cheek. She smiled. She's my queen... she knows it. If push came to shove, all the others would be gone from my house. She's knows her place and it's at the very top.

"When are you leaving for NYC?"

"Tomorrow babe."

I was flying back home to NYC. I had business to take care of. I'm making a new celebrity tits movie for my website and I'm going back east to promote it... and get some footage too. Even though my family lives in Cali now, like me, my grandmother has a beach house in the Hamptons and she's letting me use it, while I'm there. I'm also in talks... with my close friend from home, Drita Davanzo, about doing a Mob Wives porno. Yeah, I didn't believe it either when I first heard about it, but I've been offered a lot of coin to direct it and star in it. Yeah, I'm a pornstar... and gigolo/pimp/paid impregnator of famous... Or just rich... women. Fucking is my business... and business is damn good.

"I'll have to meet you there babe. My damn show's filming schedule is a pain. I told them I wanted off so I could go with you... but they said they need to get it done by tomorrow night. Damn show."

"Its ok babe. Business is business. It's fine. I'll be looking forward to welcoming you to New York... my way."

Kim came over and sat in my lap, facing me, her legs to my sides. She smiled and kissed me. "I'll definitely be looking forward to that." We kissed. Those full, luscious lips of hers taste so damn good. "I wanna be with you all the time James. That's when I'm really happy. My man makes me smile so big." We kissed again, hugging tight. I nuzzled her big breasts, kissing them. Kim held my head to her chest. I rubbed my face all over her cleavage, licking and kissing every inch. Just then, my housekeeper Yvonne came in.

We greeted each other and Kim got up, kissed me and went upstairs to get dressed. "Love you handsome."

"Love you too hottie." Kim pulled her robe up and wiggled the world's most famous ass at me. I love her ass... and her.

Yvonne is a very nice lady. She's black and middle aged. She's a big lady... a bbw. She has a huge ass and huge titties to go along with them. She was wearing a tight white, low cut top that those huge natural titties were busting out of. She also had on a short, tight beige skirt and white sneakers. She saw me checking her out and came over. Yvonne didn't say a word. She reached down and pulled my cock out of my silk pajama bottoms, leaned over and sucked it all the way down. Yvonne's a deepthroat queen. She bobbed her head on it, sucking hard, licking the shaft, her saliva coating my cock. Her long, curly black hair was pinned up in the back and it shook as she bobbed quickly on my white cock.

She jerked my shaft quickly pulling her mouth off of it and drooling down onto my head. She quickly sucked me deep, bobbing that head faster. I played with her huge black tits, through her blouse, squeezing them, loving those huge black titties in my hand. Yvonne sucked me faster and faster, jerking me faster as well. My cock was throbbing and she sucked me voraciously, suctioning out my cum, her sexy thick lips wrapped tightly around my thick manmeat. Her red lipstick was smeared all over my cock. Yvonne wrapped her lips tightly around my head and jerked my shaft with blazing speed. Her hand flew up and down on my cock so rapidly. I grunted and pumped my creamy load into her sucking mouth. She hungrily swallowed every damn drop, jerking it out and swallowing it down. Yvonne sucked me clean and kissed my head.

Yvonne put my cock back in my pajama bottoms. I kissed her cheek. "Thanks Yvonne."

"Anytime baby." She went to start cleaning around the house.

My sisters came in and all kissed me. Kat and Jessica had to go. Kat, even though she lives with me, was filming a movie and Jessica is married with kids. Nikki Dee was staying with me while she was in town. She works on the east coast as a meteorologist, but was visiting me. I walked them to the door. We hugged and Kat and Jessica started to leave. Kat was the last one. "Love you big bro, see you tonight. Think about my marriage proposal. I wanna marry you and have 20 kids with you... so be ready." I kissed her and laughed.

"That all? Just 20?... OK babe, I'll think about it." I reminded Kat about a client I had for her... yes, I pimp my sisters... just Kat and Jessica... Nikki Dee hasn't taken that step yet. I kissed her again and smacked her sexy, phat ass. I waved to them and went back into the dining area. Nikki Dee was eating. One of my other wives, Ronda Rousey, came in and kissed me.

"Well good morning my love. Sexiest husband on earth." She hugged me. We made out. I smacked her perfect, softly muscular ass and squeezed it. I picked her up and carried her to my seat. I sat down with her in my lap. My other two wives were out of town. Serena Williams was in New York playing in the US Open and Stephanie McMahon was out of town on business for WWE.

My assistant Spence walked in. I met him in New York several years ago. I met him through another friend, Carrie Heffernan. I hired him as an assistant and he's also a cameraman for me on my porn movies. He lives with us. I caught him off guard. "Hey Spence, quick."

"Huh?"

I winked at Nikki Dee. She smiled and looked at Spence, who had his camera. She opened her bathrobe and flashed him those awesome DD tits. Spence stared, but to his credit, he quickly filmed it. I like to tease him and test his reflexes with the camera. Nikki Dee has the most beautiful smile and she mesmerized Spence. She shook those perfect, natural jugs and blew a kiss to the camera. Ronda and I laughed at Spence as we ate. My assistant, Beth walked in. She saw what we were doing and tested Spence herself. She's a blonde haired, milf bbw with huge, natural jugs and she pulled up her blue tee shirt and sports bra flashing him. "Over here Spence."

Spence quickly moved the camera to Beth and captured those huge melons. She shook them and Spence stared, drooling. Ronda and I laughed some more as she fed me toast with jelly. I stared too. Beth's tits are truly awesome. She pulled her sports bra back over her massive tits and pulled her shirt down. Nikki Dee came over and kissed me. She went back to her room, blowing me a kiss and wiggling her sweet ass at me. Beth brought me some papers to sign for some advertising I set up for the movie.

I got a call from my mom. "Hey mom. How's the sexiest mom ever?"

"Awww. I'm fine sweetie. How's my baby?"

"Hey... I'm just living my life. Having a freaking blast."

"I bet you are. I just wanted to ask, if it was ok, if I came over for a little while. Your idiot father is driving me crazy again."

I could hear my dad in the distance. "I'm not driving you any damn thing. I'm working on my latest movie... You know that. Relax and take a chill pill.... I think that's what the kids say nowadays.... Yes."

"Chill my ass, you idiot. Go make your movie.... I'm talking to our son."

"Say hi to James for me.... My son has four freaking wives..... I have one and she drives me nuts.... Four? Really?"

"What did you say?"

"Nothing honey, you look marvelous. Gotta go take over the world...... and Hollywood."

I shook my head and laughed. "Sure mom. You know you can come over whenever you want. Tell dad I said hi."

"Awwww. Thanks baby. I appreciate that. OK... See you in a little while, my handsome son. Bye baby."

"Bye sexy."

I hung up. My family is interesting... I'll say that. Ronda kissed me and got up to get dressed. "Hey Spence... quick." Ronda flashed him quickly. He got her tits on camera. She closed her robe and blew me a kiss.

"Good camerawork Spence. Maybe I won't fire you now." He looked at me nervous and bewildered. I laughed. He figured out I was joking and laughed too.

My doorbell rang. Spence went to see who it was. It was my favorite cousin. My cousin Penny came in smiling and jumped in my lap. We made out and I immediately got up, with her in my arms and took her to one of the downstairs bedrooms. My Malibu home is huge. I love it. It cost me a bundle, but thankfully my careers have been going great,so I could afford it. I took Penny in the bedroom and put her on the bed. FUCK, she looked hot. Her long blonde hair in pigtails. A pink "HOTTIE" tee shirt on.... how appropriate. She had on white sweatpants with pink double stripes down the sides. Such a gorgeous chick. I fucking adore her.

She took her shirt and pink bra off. I was keeping it as a souvenir. I keep them for whenever I wanna jack off. I just wrap them around my cock and get down. Thongs too... If they turn me on. She took her pants off... she wasn't wearing panties. I got on top of her and kissed her deeply. She yanked my pajama pants off. She took my rock hard cock and slid it into her clean shaven snatch quickly. She wrapped her legs around me and I went to town, fucking that sweet pussy, fast and intensely. "MMMMMMMM... FUCK ME JAMES..... I WANT YOUR BIG COCK SO FUCKING BAD BABY!!!" I pounded that perfect, bald pussy all the fucking way in and out. Every single, hard inch thrust up her wet pussy stretching it, working it deep. We kissed and fucked.

I held her hands and arms above her head, kissing her passionately. My cock flew up her beautiful cunt, as it wrapped perfectly around my invading cock. Penny bit my bottom lip and squirted all over my cock. I fucked her harder, with supersonic, lust fueled speed. She took it all, moaning loud into my mouth. I fucked her harder, slamming my throbbing shaft into that soaking wet snatch. Penny came again, her pussy nut exploding out of the sides of her pussy. I fucked her as fast as humanly possible. Her beautiful 32C tits rubbed against my chest, as I drilled her dripping wet pussy. The bed shook and I fucked my cousin even more powerfully. Penny squirted again. It flew out of the sides of her spasming pussy again.

I looked deep into her eyes and came hard up her cunt, pumping my cream deep, my cock jerking and shooting my cum into that beautiful cunt over and over. "Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I LOVE IT...... I LOVE YOU JAMESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!" She screamed, smiling and kissing me lustfully. Penny may be married, but I'm the man she really wants.

We kissed. Penny rubbed her perfect body all over mine as we kissed. Her pink nipples were so hard rubbing against my chest. "Damn James, that's was awesome. I love fucking you, my gorgeous cousin." She kissed me again, our tongues fucking like we just did. We snuggled for a few minutes. Penny felt so damn good in my arms. "Leonard can't compete with you babe. I wanna dump him and marry you." She's married to a physicist named Leonard. They live out in Pasadena, but she comes out to my house all the time. She even stays over regularly.

"Well babe.... I've got four wives and Kat wants to marry me too. So that's six. Don't know if I could keep up." Penny softly smacked my chest and looked at me.

"Babe... keeping up will NEVER be a problem for you." She kissed me again. We made out some more. I played with her gorgeous jugs, then I went upstairs to mine and Kim's bedroom. I married her first, so she and I share a bedroom.

Kim was finishing getting ready. I just laid on the bed and watched her put on her makeup. She smiled at me and blew me a kiss in the mirror. My queen is so fucking beautiful. I went over and kissed her. "Baby, you get more beautiful every fucking day." I told her, leaning down and kissing her.

"Thank you baby. You get hotter every day... if that's possible." She smiled and put on her eyeliner. We kissed again and I went to take a quick shower.

About 45 minutes later I was downstairs in the living room with my mom, Patty, riding my cock reverse cowgirl. I love fucking my mom. She's the hottest mom ever. "FUCKKKKKKKKKKK MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE BABYYYYYYYYYY!!!" Mom rode me hard, my big, thick cock drilling up her sexy, brown haired milf snatch, as she slammed down on it. I reached up and roughly groped those beautiful, soft tits, squeezing her thick, light brown nipples. Her tasty milk shot out. I pulled her back to me and sucked my mother's tit, drinking her milk. I hungrily sucked on those tits, alternating from side to side, swallowing down that delicious milk.

Mom has beautiful, mature 34C tits. They are so soft and squeezable. I piledrove my hard cock up her sweet, mature cunt. Mom squirted again, for the fourth time. I pulled out and let her cream cover my cock, watching it shoot out of her pussy. "Ahhhhhhhh.... Yeahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!" She moaned. I slid it up her tight ass. I love fucking mom's ass. She loves my cock in her ass and it feels so fucking good. I had her legs up, as I drilled her mature ass deep, fucking it fast, my cock thrusting all the way in and out. I held her legs back, tilting her back so I could see her pussy, knowing she was ready to squirt again. She squirted on cue, blasting her juices out onto my coffee table and plush carpet. It was so fucking cool watching that. I fucked her ass relentlessly. Mom kept squirting and I kept fucking. We kissed, our tongues fucking in our mouths.

I watched mom's gorgeous tits jiggle wildly from my hard assfucking of her. I finally blasted my load up my mother's ass. "YESSSSSSS JAMESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS... CUM IN MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" I obliged, pumping my cream up that sexy, soft, but well toned, milf ass. I kissed her, then I pissed up my mother's ass. She moaned into my mouth, as we kissed. It poured out onto the floor, but I didn't care. My piss and cum mixture flooded out of my mom's ass and we just kept kissing. I finally finished pissing.

"That was great baby. Thank you."

I lit a blunt, puffed and passed it to my mom. She smoked, puffing deep and exhaling straight up in the air.

"Thank you mom.... Now where's my phone... I need to call a carpet cleaner." We laughed and kissed some more. My mom is awesome.... Hey, it's just another day in.... My Freaky Life.

To be continued...

09: PM 0 Comments  (Add Comment)  |  

Back to Blog List

Back to Blog List