Swagg Pimpin' Sex Parody

On the patio outside my penthouse suite at the Beverly Hills Hotel. Lighting a blunt. Smoking, looking at the pool party downstairs. All nude and shit... swaggin'... hangin' 10 thick. Hands on the rail, smoke in the air.

What's next Dick? What about those lame ass hoes that talk shit on Literotica? Who's gettin' swagg pimped next? God damn I'm horny... where's my bitch at?

"There you are sweetie. I was wondering where you went." Penny (from The Big Bang Theory) walks out... wearing only a pink and white bandana around her head and a white cotton hotel towel. She kisses my cheek and stands beside me.

"Sweetie... you're all comfy huh? Showing off that gorgeous cock of yours." Penny reaches down and strokes my dick. I smoke and watch the people partying.

"Just thinkin' about life. A lot of shit to deal with... gonna start fresh and drop the lame shit that's been eating away at me. Time for me to be me and show these motherfuckers who Dick The Motherfucking Pimp really is. No rules... no BS... no fucks given. Swagg out with my big ass cock out. Pimp of Pimps."

"That's right baby... you're the motherfucking king. The Pimp of Pimps. Swagged out with that gorgeous cock out sweetie." Penny wants me. She takes her towel off. I look over her hot ass body.

We spend the next half hour fucking right there on the patio...the people at the pool looking up and cheering us on. Penny's bent over the rail, my 10 inches buried in her bald, pussy cum coated snatch. I grab her bandana, pull it and force fuck her pussy mercilessly. My crotch slaps her ass and thighs hard, each time I thrust hard up her pussy, driving all 10 thick inches up her sweet snatch.

"FCUKKKKKKKKKK...POUND MY PUSSY SWEETIE... I'M YOUR BITCH... USE ME DADDY!!"

Penny squirts like a fountain, all over my impaling cock and out onto my big, meaty balls. I also her right tit, as it hangs down, jiggling from the pussy pounding I'm giving her.

"YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!" Penny squirts again.i pull out, watch her pussy jizz shoot out, then I SLAM back up her snatch,all the damn way. I fuck that sweet pussy supersonics fast, my cock flying at hyper speed in and out, my crotch slapping that perfect ass each fucking time I thrust in.

I twist and pull her rubbery, hard, pink nipples. I twist them as hard as possible. Penny screams out in pleasurable pain. I pull the nipples, then shake them as fast as possible. "OH MY GODDDDDDDDD...YESSSSSSSSSSSS!!" Penny loves it all. She blasts out another load of pussy cum, right as I fill her pounded out cunt full of my cock cream.

"FUCK!! FILL MY PUSSY WITH YOUR CUM SWEETIE...I FUCKING LIVE YOUR BIG COCK!!" Penny gasps for air, worn out sexually.

We kiss... our tongues fucking. I slap and squeeze those sweet 32C titties, as they onlookers at the pool applaud and whistle for our performance. We wave. I stand next to the railing and start pissing. My piss rains down from above. The partiers cheer. I smirk. "Oh my God babe. Your pissing all over them and they love it. Oh my God. I love LA."

"So do I baby do... so the fuck do I." I raise my left arm, as the people cheer, and keep pissing from the penthouse. You gotta love the crazy, drunk ass, partying motherfuckers in LA.

I'm staying in the Beverly Hills Hotel while my new pad in Beverly Hills is being remodeled. The pimp life pays very well... especially mine. I brought in 4 mil last week alone. You see, I'm a celebrity pimp. I pimp a non famous ho from time to time... or just for the hell of it, but usually it's movie stars, pop stars and WWE sluts for me. I made 50 Gs from Sasha Banks yesterday. A judge wanted to dip his old vanilla stick in her sweet milk chocolate, so I set it up. I got my assistant Spence (from The King of Queens) to film it, so I could watch it... and put it on my website... with a little editing to cover the judge's face.

Later in the day...

"Damn Dick... you can do some blow babe." My drug buddy, former pornstar turned comedienne Alia Janine says, watching me snort two 8 balls. I watch her snort one off of my body... from my chest down to my cock.

"Sexy slut. Snort that shit." Alia smiles up at me and shirts her way down to my cock head. She licks it, then sucks it. She bobs her dark brown haired head, as she blows me, suctioning her wet lips tightly up and down my ten inches. Five minutes later, I blow my wad in her mouth. I fill Alia's slutty mouth with my cock cream. She happily gulps it all down.

I pimp Alia too. Twenty five Gs for a titty fuck or blowjob. Thirty for anal. Forty for the full experience. My rates for my hoes vary.

A few other of my hoes... Courteney Cox 250 to 500 Gs... Jennifer Aniston 500 to a million... Tyra Banks 500 to a million... Courtney Love 40 to 50 Gs... Jenna Jameson 50 to 100 Gs... Mariah Carey 400 to 750 Gs. I have a lot of other hoes. I have a Kardashian family rate of 2 to 5 mil for the sisters... except Kim, she's mine... and the mother. I wouldn't even consider pimpin' Kim for less than 10 mil... I've had several offers that high.

I pimp my girl Penny on special occasions. 25 K for a bj... an will cost ya 50 K. She's got the sweetest ass.

Later that night...

I'm hanging out... smoking, doing some blow, and drinking with my girl Penny and my assistant Spence (from The King of Queens). Penny is mostly wasted. Spence has only smoked and drank a little... He's too scared to do coke.

After about an hour of convincing, I get him to snort a small line. I laugh at the nerdy motherfucker. He's so timid sometimes, it's funny as hell. He's always nervous. It gets on my nerves, but he's a good lackey, so I keep him around.

Penny's looking smoking hot as usual. She's got on a pink, skimpy, two piece, thong bikini and pink stripper pumps. She's got her long blonde hair in braids, aka Bo Derek in the movie 10. She's also got on the pink and white bandana from earlier. Damn... Penny is a hot bitch... for fucks sake.

Spence and I have on our swim trunks. I've also got on my SWAGG PIMPIN' gold and diamond studded chain. Always swagged out.

We smoke and drink some more. Penny is horny and wasted. We make out, while Spence finishes the blunt. My fucking phone rings. I ignore it. It keeps ringing and I keep ignoring it, feeling up Penny, as she puts her hand in my trunks and jerks me off.

I get a text. It's from a big client... a seven figure one. He's hiring the Kardashians again. He did last week. This time he wants a gangbang with his rich friends. Damn... that's a five million dollar job. Fuck yeah! Only problem is he wants a meeting while he's in town... he's from Vegas. I decide to put off fucking Penny, so I can meet the rich, old businessman and get that 5 mil.

"Sorry babe, but business calls. A big job. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Ahhhhhh... Damn Dick... I'm horny."

"Sorry baby, but 5 mil is waiting." I kiss my disappointed girlfriend and head out.

"Damn..." Penny says... frustrated, wasted and horny. She starts playing with her 32C titties in her swimsuit, ignoring Spence. He stares and pours himself a drink. He's half baked and he's got a hard on in his swim trunks.

Penny drinks a margarita... chugs it... and pulls her tits out of her swimsuit top. Spence just stares... and pours some of the Jim Beam on his lap. It snaps him out of his lust gaze at Penny. He chugs part of the bottle and coughs hard... too much liquor for him. He keeps staring at Penny, who's still ignoring him.

Penny reaches into a drawer on the coffee table and pulls out a pink vibrator. It's small, but powerful. Spence goes wide eyed, as he watches Penny pull her thong to the side and fuck herself with the dildo... still oblivious to Spence and his drooling stare.

Spence's six inches is rock hard in his swim trunks watching Penny slide that pink vibrator slowly in and out of her leaking pussy. Each time she pulls it out, Spence sees her juices clinging to, then dripping from, the vibrator. He swallows hard... and drinks straight from the bottle of Jim Beam.

"Mmmmmmmmmm... Dick why did you leave sweetie? I need that big dick bad." Penny moas in her sexiest voice and fucks her pussy quicker with the vibrator. Her tits heave, her rubbery, pink nipples rock hard and pulsing.

Spence puts the bottle of whiskey down and rubs his thick cock, in his trunks. Penny has her eyes closed, writhing on the sofa, slowly licking her pink lip glossed, glistening, wet lips.

Penny finally opens her eyes and sees Spence. She's startled, having forgotten he was there. She's wasted, and in the middle of heavy sexual arousal. "I forgot you were here Spence."

"Its OK. Sorry I was staring. I'll leave."

Penny starts fucking herself with her pink vibrator again. The buzzing from the toy makes her squirt. "Fuck..." Penny pulls the vibrator out of her pussy and watches her pussy cum shoot out, covering the pink toy.

Spence stares hard, as he gets up to leave the room.

"It's OK sweetie. You can stay and watch if you want. I'm so fucking horny, I want you to watch me."

"Ummmm...are you sure?"

"Yes sweetie... sit down... and take out your cock, before it rips a hole in your swimtrunks." Penny smiles. She turns off the vibrator and puts it in her mouth, sucking it like a cock. She watches Spence, as he pulls his thick, six inches out. It's leaking precum, glistening like Penny's wet lips.

Penny smiles again, and sucks the vibrator clean of her pussy juices. She sees Spence's cock twitch, and pump out more clear fluid. It slowly runs down his cock. Penny licks the vibrator, driving Spence crazy. "Jerk it for me... Get some more precum out sweetie."

Spence is so turned on by the gorgeous blonde goddess across from him. He jerks his cock, careful not to go too fast and cum. The precum slowly oozes out of his cock, running down it and onto his small, chubby hands.

Penny spreads her legs wide... putting her right leg on the sofa. She rubs her clit, then spreads her juicy, cum coated labia wide. Spence stares in lustful awe at Penny's perfect, bald pussy, spread wide open for him to see. Penny spits on the vibrator then slowly slides it up her tight pussy. The vibrator eases up into Penny's pink, wet folds.

Spence is drooling. Penny laughs, and moans from the vibrator. Penny's nipples are throbbing hard. Her small areola tingling with excitement. Spence just stares, open mouthed, and jerks his cock.

"Wanna taste my pussy?" Penny surprises Spence. He nods, as he stares... in a sexual trance, so turned on by Penny.

He gets up and walks over to Penny, kneeling down in front of her. He doesn't wait for instructions. He shoves his face into Penny's soaking wet snatch and gobbles it up. The vibrator slips out into his mouth. He gags. Penny laughs and moans loudly, as Spence takes the vibrator from his mouth and shoves his tongue up Penny's delicious, bald pussy, licking every inch of her pink folds, lapping up her sweet juices.

Penny grinds on Spence's face. "FUCKKKKKKKKK... I'M COMINGGGGGGGGG!!" Penny squirt hard into Spence's sucking mouth. He's sucks it all out, and drinks it down. Spence dines on Penny cumming twat. He licks her totally clean.

"Mmmmmmmm... that was good sweetie. I guess I should return the favor." Penny pulls Spence up. His thick, soaked with precum cock jumps in front of her face. Penny smiles, then sticks out her tongue and laps up the precum, licking every inch of Spence's thick cock, collecting the fluid on her tongue. She shows it to Spence, then she pulls her tongue I to her mouth and swallows it all down. Penny smacks her lips.

"Mmmmmm... delicious sweetie. I hope the real thing tastes just as good. I'm thirsty for some cum... so feed it to me sweetie." Spence stares hard at Penny, as she engulfs his entire cock, licking all over it in her mouth, sucking fast and hard on his thick shaft. Penny's mouth bulges from his girth. Her head bobs fast.

Spence grabs Penny's head and fucks her mouth. "Mmmmmm... do it harder sweetie." Penny mumbles around his thick shaft. Spence obliges and fucks Penny's very talented mouth harder and harder, slamming into her throat.

"YEAHHHHHHHH... MMMMMMMMM." Penny mains, as Spence's cock jerks in her mouth and throat. She pulls back slightly, wanting him to dump his entire load in her sucking mouth. He does. Spence's cock pumps out his thick cream onto Penny's licking tongue.

"OHHHHHHHHHH FUCKKKKKKKKK!!" Spence yells out, as he cums. He smiles a huge, goofy smile and holds Penny's head, as he cums hard in her mouth. When he's finished, his now soft cock falls out of Penny's mouth. She opens it and shows Spence his jizz in her mouth. Penny shakes her eyebrows at Spence, and swallow his entire load in one gulp. Spence grins happily.

"Mmmmmm... the real thing tastes even better than the precum. So good sweetie. Yum! I might let you feed me some more of that from time to time. It will be our little secret." Penny smiles sweetly at Spence, and sucks him dry.

They spend the next hour with Spence's cock in Penny's ass. He loves her ass and Penny loves getting fucked in it. Spence bends her over the sofa, the counter in the kitchen and sits on the toilet as Penny rides his cock in her ass. Penny screams out in pleasure, cumming twice. She even sucks another load out, right before I get there. She swallows it down and kisses Spence... letting him taste his own jizz.

"Remember sweetie... it's our little secret. Keep your mouth shut... and your cock hard. I'll let you fuck me again if you're a good boy." Penny winks at him.

I got the five mil for the Kardashian gangbang... and not to burst Spence's bubble, but Penny tells me everything. We both fuck around, so it turned me on knowing Spence fucked her. She just told him it was their little secret to turn him on and tease him. I dig her.

Just another day for the King Pimp. I'm always... Swagged Out With My Cock Out.